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Eyles, M. Leonora

"Captivity"

I w-wanted to talk to you."
"Well!" She could find nothing else to say in her astonishment.
"Don't you see that's enough to start me drinking?" he burst out
passionately. "Whenever I get hipped about anything--I--t-told you I
know myself very well. I'd only h-had one drink when you came along. Did
you notice me?"
"_Notice_ you! Oh no!" she cried scornfully.
"Y-you know w-what a nervous f-fool I am; how I'm afraid of my own
shadow. But when I've had only one whisky I'd tackle Satan himself! You
must have noticed that I was jolly enough then! I used to be the
ringleader in all the stunts at the hospital. But when I don't drink I'm
afraid to face people. Do you know I haven't had a meal since I came
aboard, except your piece of cake and the tea I've made? And now I've
thrown my teapot overboard."
"But whyever haven't you had a meal?"
"All those damn fools in the saloon are looking at me!"
"Oh, you idiot!" she cried, and suddenly sat down on the anchor beside
him, all her indignation at the personal slight and the personal
annoyance gone.
"You see how it is, Marcella," he groaned. "I can call you Marcella,
can't I? Just till we get to Sydney. It sounds a Roman, fighting sort of
name. You see how wobbly I am! I've had the devil's own time since we
left Tilbury, lying there in my bunk, thinking, thinking--and the more
I think the more sorry I get for myself, and the more I hate other
people, and the more nervous I get.


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