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Warner, Anne, 1869-1913

"The Rejuvenation of Aunt Mary"

"
And then they got in and were off--a merry load, indeed.
"Dear me, but it's a-goin'!" Aunt Mary exclaimed, as the thing began to
whiz and she felt suddenly impelled to clutch wildly at her flanking
escorts. "Suppose we met a dog."
"We'd leave a floor mat," shrieked Mitchell. "Oh, but isn't this
great--greater--greatest?"
"Time of your life, Aunt Mary!" Jack howled, as they went over a boarded
spot in the pavement, and the old lady nearly went over the back in
consequence. "You're in for the time of your life!"
"How do you like it?" yelled Clover, throwing a glance over his shoulder.
Aunt Mary started to answer, but they came to four car tracks one after
another, and the successive shocks rendered her speechless.
"Where are we going?" Burnett asked.
"Nowhere," said Clover. "Just waking up the machine." And he turned on
another million volts as he spoke.
"Oh, my bonnet!" cried poor Aunt Mary, and that bit of her adornment was
in the street and had been run over four times before they could slow up,
turn around, and get back to the scene of its output.
It speaks volumes for the permeating atmosphere of "having the time of
your life" that its owner laughed when the wreck was shown to her.
"I don't care a bit," she said. "I can go down to Delmonico's an' get me
another to-morrow mornin', easy."
"What a trump you are, Aunt Mary!" said Jack admiringly. "Here, Burnett,
fish her out that extra cap from the cane rack; there's always one in the
bottom.


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