Why now, when he was
hurting and most needed mild weather, was he confronted by the harshest
Winter he had ever experienced?
But this was just the tip of the iceberg. If there truly was a God,
then why the innumerable and inexplicable tragedies of his life, both
great and small? And most poignant of all to him: WHY WAS SHAMA DEAD?
All the other deaths and injuries he had known could perhaps, with an
effort, be rationalized. But why a mere child, healthy and intelligent,
with his whole life ahead of him?
He did not forget the other miracles of his life: the fact that he had
been born at all, that he had survived the many pitfalls of his
existence, and come against considerable odds to find the woman-child,
whom he loved. He remembered the Voice, but could not make its words
correspond to those of the Bible.
And why, now, did he feel as if some tangible force resisted and sought
to undo him? What was his sin? Was it because he refused, out of
ignorance, to acknowledge the power and supremacy of the one true God?
If he obeyed His rules and precepts, would He then smile upon him, and
make his life more bearable? And the final nail, as it always has been,
was the burning question that neither Sylviana, nor anyone or anything
else could answer for him. Was the spirit eternal, and if so, was there
a way to come to paradise after death, and be reunited with the ones he
loved?
It was for him a crushing burden, feeling that his decision, his answer
to God, held the key not only to his own spiritual salvation, but to
that of those he loved more than his own life.
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