In the early days of our friendship, about eight months
ago, she occasionally at these times took refuge with me. After a
while I insisted on her consulting a doctor, who advised her,
amongst other things, not to sleep alone. Thenceforth for two or
three months I induced her to share my room. After a week or two
she generally shared my bed for a time at the beginning of the
night, as it seemed to help her to sleep.
"Before this, about the second or third time that she came to me
in the early morning, I had been surprised and a little
frightened to find how pleasant it was to me to have her, and how
reluctant I was that she should go away. When we began regularly
to sleep in the same room, the physical part of our affection
grew rapidly very strong. It is natural for me generally to
caress my friends, but I soon could not be alone in a room with
this one without wanting to have my arms round her. It would have
been intolerable to me to live with her without being able to
touch her. We did not discuss it, but it was evident that the
desire was even stronger in her than in me.
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