Electronic book host

About ten years later I heard he used to
accept money after intimate intercourse with those society men.
"During my fifteenth year I had great longing for sexual
intercourse with men. At this time the first signs of hair were
to be seen on my abdomen.
"At the age of 16 a gardener, a married man with family,
initiated me into mutual self-abuse. He lived in the back house
of the apartment house we then inhabited. He was about 40 years
of age, an ugly but muscularly developed man. These practices
took place in the cellar, to which there were three entrances. I
never allowed him to kiss me and the sight of his children always
awoke in me a great feeling of nausea. That was the natural
reaction of a bad conscience. For the man himself I had the
utmost contempt. This man told me of several parks and _pissoirs_
where men met, and I went to these places now and again for
erotic adventure.
"I must here relate that at the age of 16 my mother warned me
against self-abuse. It had the opposite effect, made me curious,
so I began at once.


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