At first I thought it silly,
but I used to watch him at it, and practised it myself from time
to time until I became old enough to experience the proper
sensation. Then I have reason to think I gave myself up to it
rather freely, but it was generally done in solitude, although it
was long before I realized that there was anything wrong about it
or that it might prove hurtful. Looking back now, I feel
perfectly certain that my instincts were wholly homosexual from
the very first. This cousin, who possessed notable intellectual
and artistic gifts, married, but I feel sure his liking for his
own sex was not normal.
"With another cousin, almost years my junior, I was always on
terms of the most affectionate intimacy. My holidays at his
parents' house were my greatest delight. We were always together
by night or day; we slept in the same bed, literally in each
other's arms. To me it afforded the keenest sexual pleasure to
press close to his naked body. We used mutually to handle and
caress our parts, but without any attempt at mutual masturbation,
although at that period I regularly practised it on myself.
Pages:
209
210
211
212
213
214
215
216
217
218
219
220
221
222
223
224
225
226
227
228
229
230
231
232
233