I was easily brought
to appreciate good literature, but I never had much power of
expression or of strenuous thought. I was extremely susceptible
and impressible, moved by beauty of any kind, but never at all
ambitious or in any way creative. I was easily stimulated to
work, and then loved to work; but, unless the stimulus were
maintained the natural indolence of my disposition asserted
itself, and I wasted my powers in dreams and trifles. My memory
was very quick and retentive, in the main, but curiously
capricious. I always lacked initiative and decision. At college
my successes were continued. I gained medals and prizes, passed
my examinations easily, and graduated 'with first-class honors.'
In my professional lifework I have been successful rather beyond
the average. I love it with all my heart.
"I cannot speak with any confidence about the first stirrings of
my sexual instincts, but I think I can assert that they have at
no time led me to any desire for the opposite sex. It is true
that my earliest recollection of the kind is concerned with
intimacies with a girl play-fellow, but as we had at the time
reached only the mature age of 7 (at the most) I fancy that our
mutual exhibitions--for there was nothing more--simply satisfied
our natural curiosity.
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